Thursday, March 5, 2009

"you know I am paranoid"

Went for my monitoring this morning, b/w only. My E2 only rose to 99 (was 40 two days ago). Comparing to last cycle, it was 148 on this same day. They are keeping me on the same meds (225 Follistim/10 Lupron) for tonight and tomorrow, and I'll go back Saturday for more b/w. I was at lunch when she called, and in a loud restaurant, so I really didn't have time to process.

But then I got back to my office and the obsessing began:-( I called my nurse to get her thoughts. I feel so stupid when I call them back, they must think I am a nutcase. When C called me, I prefaced my question by saying "you know I am paranoid." C said, "we know each other well, it's ok." I've been around waaaaaayy too long.

Anyhoo. I told her my concern. She said it was rising slowly, but she really didn't see a problem. She agreed that it was rising more slowly with IVF #1. She agreed it was probably the BCP. She told me I was smart to question it, but reiterated she didn't think it was a problem. She said she would get concerned if we don't see a significant rise at the next 2 monitoring appts. She told me to keep asking my question if I continue to worry about it.

Generally, she tried to appease me a bit. So no, I don't really feel much better. She did say they try not to cancel cycles, so if anything, they may increase my meds more...before actually cancelling.

I can't take this. Too much stress. I hate not knowing. I hate...alot of things right now, and am getting really bitchy.

MAJOR family drama went down last night and I was completely stressed out. This is not helping.

1 comment:

Sara Scissors said...

I'm so sorry the family drama continues. :( I am just like you on calling the nurse with extra questions (actually I'm already doing it and I'm not even cycling yet!).

I agree with her though, I think you'd rather stim slowly then fast and end up with OHSS. Slow and steady wins the race...I promise! Crossing my fingers (and toes) that your next 2 checks go well!