Dumpster Diving and other IF news...

This may be long, since I've already had a full day and it's just now noon:-)

Dan's phone died, so we replaced it last night. With the phone was a $50 rebate. I woke up this morning to the knowledge that we can't send in the rebate without the UPC code...which is on the box...in the trashbag...in the dumpster. I was a woman possessed. I just kept thinking of that UPC code as a 50 dollar bill. So...off Sierra and I go to the dumpster, which is one of those very deep, industrial size ones. I couldn't let Sierra off her leash b/c there's an alpha dog up the street that is just waiting to attack her (and she feels the same way).

It's my luck that the trash people came yesterday, and so our trashbag was at the bottom of the dumpster. The good news was there was only one other trash bag and I knew which one was ours. I found some branches nearby to try to stab the bag with and pull it up. Three tries and three broken branches. I finally found a branch that was a little sturdier, but it still wouldn't pull up the bag.

Finally...I looked around to see if anyone was watching, gave one final stab to the bag and let go of the lid (meaning I was leaning into the dumpster with no support), and I got my trashbag!!!
I pulled out the cell phone box and Sierra and I were on our way:-)

In IF news...I had my pre-op appt with Dr. K this morning. She let me know again that she didn't think the surgery is necessary, but respects my desire to have it done and see what, if anything, is going on in there. I left feeling a little scared as she talked to me about all the risks...knowing that this is indeed an elective surgery and not something that HAS to be done. They will also do another HSG while they are in there, to ensure my tubes are clean. thank GOD I'll be knocked out, as that was the most horrible test I've had so far.

Beta-3 intergrin test isn't looking good. She's asked several people at the university and no one is doing this test clinically. If she can't find someone who is doing it clinically (meaning for non-research purposes) she can't do it.

She also thinks the Family Fund fundraiser for November will be cancelled. She isn't sure, but did say it's not a great time to be asking people for money. I get that, but am upset that this isn't an option right now.

If we can scrape the $$ together, she did say I could start Lupron with my December cycle, and be ready for the ER in January. Guess I'll be asking my parents for more money.

Small update

Sorry I couldn't get more creative with the title.

I talked to Dr. K this afternoon. She gave me the name of the HR person to contact, so now I can send my letter. The RE's aren't meeting about our case until *next* Tuesday so she'll call me after that and let me know if they talked about any other tweaks to my case.

She checked and saw that my name is on the Family Fund list. She reiterated that there is a fund-raiser in November. She also told me that she is going to it (I didn't know that before), and will try her best to raise lots of money. That made me feel good...like she is there fighting for me.

I also asked about the beta 3 integrin test. I intro'd to that topic by telling her I'd decided on the lap, and was curious about her experience with any implantion tests. She asked what I had in mind and that's when I told her the name of the test. She said they don't routinely do things like that, and if it qualified (not really sure what she meant by that) as "experimental" that they wouldn't be able to do it. She will be talking with the other RE's about this on Tuesday as well. She did make the comment that "you know I would do anything for you if I could." God I love her.

All for now.

Not a great IF weekend

For starters, I felt myself starting to O on Friday night. Yes, for those of you who think I'm an idiot, I can feel it. My anxiety level went up immediately. I knew there was no hope of doing anything about it, so I tried to talk myself down from the ledge. Seriously though, I hate being this in tune with my body. It sucks. Why can I just be in blissful oblivion? I know that the chances of conceiving without medical intervention are about null at this point, so why try? Rationally, I know this. However, it didn't stop me from thinking that I was wasting my eggs for another month. Ugh.

Then, last night I had a horrible IF dream. I can't tell you specifically what it was about, b/c I don't remember it all. I remember just enough to know it was about IF and an un-supportive family (which I don't have) and I woke up with my heart pounding. Horrible, horrible. Guess I can discuss that at my therapy appt tomorrow. Yes, I finally made one, for 3 pm on Monday. I'm not really sure what good it's going to do, but I'll try it and see what I think.

In fun news...since I started this post early this morning I got to have breakfast with a friend I met on the Nest, and her sweet little boy:-) It so helps to talk about this crap, and also to see that I *can* get to the other side...I just have to wait my turn:-(

Our conversation also got me thinking about getting a lap. Mentally, I had left it as...well Dr. K doesn't think I need it, so why do it. Also, I was going to get ask Dr. S at my second opinion appt. If he said I didn't need it, I would believe both of them. But I think it might give me some piece of mind. I'm hoping to get a call from Dr. K next week, to update me on the RE group consensus of my case. When I talk to her, I'm going to ask if she could do the lap and the beta-3 integrin test at the same time. This is a test to determine implantation issues. This was on my list of questions for last week...but the conversation totally took another turn in talking about IVF #2 and I didn't ask.

So that's my weekend. Nothing too exciting. I have my letter to HR just about finalized, and hope to be sending that next week.