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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

my new (kind of sick) obsession

My curiousity has turned into obsession. Each day, I google whatever day pregnant am (today would be 11 weeks, 5 days) and look at all u/s pictures that I can find. It's a bonus if there is actually a video. I am just intrigued by what is going on inside of me right now, and apparently have the need to see.it.every.day.

It's weird, and kind of sick, and gross...I know all these things but I still do it.

I'm actually thinking of taking our camera to the NT scan on Thursday, not to take a picture, but b/c it has a 2-3 minute video capacity. Then I'd have my own video:-)

Symptoms wise...nausea is still there, but not as constant as it has been. I opted not to get the Zofran script filled, since my lovely insurance company won't pay for it, and I refuse to pay $150 for 30 pills. So, unless it gets REALLY bad, I'll just suck it up.

I continue to be completely exhausted. My b-day was Sunday. I was asleep by 6 pm. I'm regularly sleeping AT LEAST 10 hours a day, sometimes straight through...other times with a nap or two built in.

I've been noticing my dreams have also been getting more "real." Last night, I actually dreampt that I was having a nightmare. In my dream, I was able to tell myself it was a nightmore, and actually got to "enjoy" it, since I knew it wasn't real. It was sort of like watching my own scary movie.

The closer it gets, I'm extremely nervous about Thursday. I just feel like if all looks good I can finally start to relax and enjoy. (OK, I know this probably isn't the case, but it's what I tell myself to get through another day). And by "look good" I simply mean a good heart beat. Even if we get discouraging news regarding Downs or something else, I will consider it a great day if there is a still a heart beating at the correct rate.

2 comments:

andrea said...

can you bring a VHS tape to the NT Scan? For mine, we could record it on a VHS tape (had to dig up a vcr, but totally worth it!)

I totally understand why you are so into the development. I took developmental biology in college and it is sooo interesting to me. That's why I liked that journal book so much, because it went into all that detail.

Are you going to ask your tech to guess on the sex at the scan? Any guesses as to what you are having?

Bluebird said...

Do you realize how incredibly sweet this post is? I'm sitting here similing for you :) Precious.