Tuesday, March 1, 2011

still have two heartbeats:)

Yesterday was our 8w1d ultrasound. Both babies were measuring on track, the same length actually. One had a heartrate of 177 and the other 184. We saw arm/leg buds on both, and the spine (very cool!) of one. I took a video, primarily of the heartbeats, but of course I'm having trouble uploading here.

Baby A was doing some wiggling, but B was superchill. It's amazing how much they've grown in just 13 days. The sacs seem supersized, lol. I'm beginning to wonder how my body is going to handle this.

After the u/s we met with Dr. K one last time. The consult room we used was the same one that saw MANY tears once upon a time. Several rooms have seen my tears, but this particular cryfest stood out to me. I'm fairly certain it was my WTF appt post failed FET #1, and my attempts to convince Dr. K that she needed to cut me open and look for endo. So, it was bittersweet that this was the last place we met with her.

She said babies looked great, vanishing twin syndrome should not be an issue at this point, and the chance of miscarriage is a bit more than 5%. She confirmed due dates, played with Sophie, and chatted with us about our plans.

I didn't expect to cry. I really didn't. But when we stood up, I hugged her and the waterworks started as I tried to say "thank you." It came out more of a blubbering mess. Then, Dan started crying. Poor Dr. K;) She ordered us to keep her posted, and to bring the babies in next fall.

So that's that. All done with the RE. Forever. Even if something happens with this pregancy, I really think I'm done. I'm done with the emotions and anxiety of it all.
And the guilt that I am still dealing with towards Sophie and feeling like I've ruined her life has really put in perspective for me that she is all I really need. Anything else is just a bonus:)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

yAY!!PLEASE don't feel guilty... one of the most amazing things EVER is watching my kids interact/play and that is what you are giving all three of them... EACH OTHER.

It is a transition but kids are flexible, they adjust, and I know you will do everything in your power to dote on Sophie during the pregnancy and beyond and she WILL know that. LT