Livid

I'm a huge proponent of picking the battles that I think I can win (or that need to be fought). I fought one last night. Connor still takes the Propanalol 2 mls, TID. Since I stopped pumping about 2 weeks ago, I have stopped making his bottles. When I was pumping, I would make them primarily because I was supplementing with formula and wanted to make sure he got the right amount, but also because Dan seems to think he will turn to stone if he touches breastmilk.

Dan has been making his daily bottles the last 10 days or so. My routine is to put 2 mls in each of his first three bottles, which are the three bottles that Dan has been making. I noticed a few days ago that the medicine was running low, it just seemed like we were running through it really quickly, but I didn't give it all that much thought. My main concern was that insurance won't refill until x date, and I didn't want him to go without.

Last night, something just told me to ask about the meds. The medicine was getting so low in the bottle that I couldn't draw out with a syringe, so I poured a bit into a medicine cup, took the syringe and gave it to Dan. I asked him to show me how much medicine he's been putting in each of the bottles. He looked at the syringe like he'd never seen it before. He told me that he always just pours it straight into the medicine cup, and then into the bottle. RED FLAG, the cup does not have a 2ml level. Apparently he's been giving him FIVE mls per bottle, which is over DOUBLE the prescribed amount.

When I calmly asked why he was giving him that much, his response was "because that's what I thought you said." I walked away. I looked at the bottle again, read the instructions AGAIN, and knew I was going to lose my shit. I was so mad I was shaking. Always cognizent that Sophie is listening, I somehow remained calm.

I questioned why he didn't read the bottle. He of course became defensive. "Well, perfect mom, why don't you make the bottles from now on?" I said that I would, but that I thought I could rely on him to administer medication correctly.

It's obviously not about the battle, it's about doing what we need to do to keep Connor healthy. I said something like "after the Walgreens debacle, how can you NOT read the label. You've been giving him over TWICE what he needs. It's an adult medicine that causes lowered heartrate." He just looked at me.

I finally just stopped. I'm too tired to fight, what's done is done, but yes I WILL be making Connor's bottles from now on. And, no wonder his hemangioma seems to have shrunk down to nothing.

Side note: I ALWAYS check the meds before I give anything. We seriously have a mini medicine chest on our kitchen counter. Most of it is for Sophie, but we also have the infant tylenol, Connor's meds, etc. I check the type, the name (if it's Rx), and the dose each time. I just don't trust my brain these days to make a guess at what I am giving them. Plus, with a possible red food dye allergy for Sophie, I check ingrediants as well.